Now for your Bonsella

In my native country, a bonsella is the "something extra" you receive: usually something pleasant, like a surprise gift or a tip. (While we're on the semantics, it is occasionally used as a euphemism for a bribe.)

This particular refinement comes from the Scottish Centre for Confidence and Well-being where I have now come across a suggestion for using this list to influence your dreams.

Clearly, if one is having delightful dreams, which "consolidate the memories of good events" you may even be able to greet the morning with a sleepy smile rather than a shudder. So, here's how it may be possible to use the list to have a more pleasant 'nightlife'.

Here's "the drill" I found on their web site, exactly as it appears:

1. Give the positive event a name.
2. Visualise it.
3. As you go to sleep, say the name over and over. Visualise it and intend to dream about it.
4. In the morning, write down your positive dream.
5. Note your mood when awakened in the morning.

I'm a little cautious on this as I haven't tried this out, partly because I drift off to sleep with indecent speed and I'm quite happy with the range of dreams that are presented to me. However, if your sleep is restless, you might want to give it a go. However I suspect that the three good things you've been focusing on at the end of your day, may themselves have sent you off in a positive frame.

See you back in the gym soon.

Not Just One Good Thing

These workouts are about raising your levels of happiness. Not about positive thinking, optimism or self-esteem. There is a difference, but I’ll slip that in another time. Let’s get started.

Time for our warm-ups

I’m not messing you round by saving the best for last here.

In many ways this one is The Biz.

Why should we do this? Doing this exercise will make you happier. The increase in happiness from doing it, is measurable and sustained. So is the decrease in symptoms of depression.

How many circuits? In the research programmes that have used this exercise, sticking to it for a week was suggested.

Is it hard to stick to? Apparently not. People keep doing it after they’re told they can stop. (60% of the people who have been taught this exercise are still happily doing it, on their own initiative six months later. That has to beat the staying rate of January Joiners at your local gym.)

What’s my base line? If you want to get on the scales before you start, you can do that here: Happiness Questionnaires


Today’s Workout

Christopher Peterson, in A Primer of Positive Psychology (New York: Oxford, 2006), calls this exercise Three Good Things, pointing out that it’s a lot like counting your blessings. This is going to be a three step routine. Here's how...

Towards the end of the day, before you go to sleep, set aside a time to list three things that went well during the day. OK? Stop at three good things. No more, no less.

For each thing that went well, answer the question, Why did this good thing happen?

Finally, consider the question, What did I do to help make this good thing happen? Occasionally you might feel you’ve already done this, in answering the second question. Try anyway, but if you can’t answer this one more specifically, don’t worry.

Do this exercise every night for a week

Time for the Cool-down

Nearly there. Now record your answers by jotting them down.

If you find this hard to do, or you think you're not going to be terribly good at looking back on your day, you could jot candidates for the list down during the day. You could maybe keep one of those tiny notebooks from Paperchase handy for this, or one of those Muji key ring thingummies, the ones with a wad of small blank flashcards attached. But these records are not your list. You must wait until close to bedtime to do this!

If writing really isn’t your thing, then tell a dictaphone or a live person. But it is not enough to tell yourself.

Let the rest of us here in the gym know how this exercise goes.

Come on down for your first workout!

Right here. First class tomorrow.

No gym kit needed. No trainers. No leotards.

No joining fee. Not any kind of fee.

All welcome.